If I don’t take meds I feel I should be doing things and then feel bad when I don’t.
Or if I do take meds I get a lot of things done and feel productive but zaped of energy.
Hobbies are either invested in and dropped or I just feel ‘bored’ and don’t want to get any of the stuff out to do them. If they stick around a bit longer they then feel like a chore or become a larger project and just another thing in the to-do pile and not relaxing.
Where is the off button and how do I relax?
The nagging need to be doing something may very well be some comobid anxiety. Isn’t that fun?
What helps me relax is having time scheduled specifically for nothing, or “unproductive time,” where I can let my mind can just function on autopilot. Maybe I’ll decide to read, or play a game, or cook an elaborate meal, or go for a run. Whatever pops up, for as long as I feel like doing it. What’s important is scheduling the downtime so that you can consider it its own task and you’re less tempted to go be “productive.” You can try it medicated or not, I’ve had success with the method both ways.
I have this problem baaad and aside from what others have suggested, exercise is always the key aspect for me. A quick 20-30 minute run can work wonders. My psych told me this is a very effective and simple solution that works for many ADHD folks.
I hate that the exercise people are right. Never been an active person and I haaaaate cardio.
I have seen the benifits though but it’s SO hard to get started.
Like even get ready the night before, park next to the gym, get changed after work. All the tips. And I’ll just get in my car and go home.
Yeah I hear you. I actually enjoy exercise and I still skip it all the time even if I prepared everything lol. It still works as an emergency escape hatch it anxiety gets too hard
Look into getting something you can use to exercise while you’re doing something else. Like, I have an under the desk bike and I use it daily. Helps me keep somewhat active, and it helps me get that number-go-up dopamine hit from my smart watch stepsive hit close to 50k steps in a single day when I was having a particularly stressful work day, and my calves definitely feel like I’d been active for a good while.
I don’t have all the answers. Not even close. One thing that works, but takes time, is using the meds to build the “good” habits that you want to have. After a while, I’ve been able to do some of things I used to find impossible without needing to take Adderall first. Initiating the task is still the most challenging thing for me I think. You’re not alone in this struggle though. I totally saw myself in what you wrote. I can say it’s not like that every day for me; some days are better than others. I would totally be down to talk through any of this if you are ever so inclined, or even if you are in the moment and need some feedback. I got diagnosed like 3 years ago, and it has been quite a ride so far.
Meditation (for a lot of people) is an exercise in learning that even doing nothing is active. Doing nothing is still doing. Rest is an important part of being productive. Rest is not a waste of time, so you don’t need to feel guilty over it. These are all lessons that the brain can understand on its face immediately, but the body requires reinforcement and practice.
And if stillness is a problem you struggle with, walking meditation or meditation through movement can be a more approachable way to get started. There are lots of ways to meditate, find the ones that work for you. Meditation isn’t a cure all, but it does have wide ranging impacts and it doesn’t hurt to try it.
oh my fffing god those are most of the thoughts and dilemmas that analyze-paralyze me
i feel like shit whether i do or don’t 🤦🏾♀️
I’m not really succeeding in getting past it. but the only tip i can maybe give is what my therapist said:
try to do something small, one time then take a break. then again, something small, take a break. repeat
anti anxiety med (gabapentin) also help me reduce the mental hurdle of starting things.
i hope you can find what works for you
I fell you.
This seems to be things that help to start things, but it’s the stopping that’s the problem.
If I start small I do the wholee thing, then the next and the next. Then it’s bedtime and I haven’t sat down all day.
Not quite shure how id apply that to relaxing. I guess do nothing for one minute or something.
oh i think i understand better now.
yeah maybe try to focus on taking breaks after a pre-decided amount of time.
deleted by creator
Weed helps for me lol
I’ve also found that if I have enough projects, I can often switch between them to keep myself feeling good. So I have like 5 different fiction pieces in writing, I’m in the middle of three different books, and twice as many TV shows. I have a handful of videogames I know I can play in short bursts.
For me, it feels like I’ve embraced “being ADHD.” People often tease us for being distractible and never finishing anything, but I think I’m starting to realize I just operate on a longer timescale than most. As long as I have enough bodies in orbit, I can keep myself balanced between them, because I’ll always have somewhere to go to find myself
