Maybe my experience is out of the norm, but I did some searching online for recommendations of psychologists that do ADHD evaluations. I called the most recommended and was told they had no open appointments but recommended three others that often have availability. I checked those out, chose one, and made an appointment online. They specifically have adult ADHD evaluation as a service they provide with a defined set of appointments and processes. I did an online appointment first, followed by a ton of surveys and questionnaires (it was I think 5 different forms with 30-50 questions each). My wife also did one. I had an in person appointment with some testing over the course of an hour or so, then a follow up to discuss my diagnosis. Of note, it was a few hundred dollars, paid out of our HSA and covered by insurance as mental health services. I didn’t need to “game” anything. I was on time for appointments, honest, and upfront about everything. I discussed why I was looking into this at 30+ years old (I was noticing it interfering with my work and home life more, and through talking to friends and seeing videos online I started to suspect ADHD was a likely explanation for struggles and experiences I’ve had my whole life). Medication never came up during the evaluation, and afterward it only came up in terms of an option for treatment but advised as part of a larger regime of therapy. Psychologists can’t prescribe anything anyways. I do take medication now though it isn’t a stimulant (what OP refers to as pharma speed which is a gross mischaracterization of stimulant medications for ADHD, but it seems they are aware of that and don’t care about continuing to stigmatize ADHD treatments) and both my wife and I have seen a huge difference in my ability to generally function in ways that are healthy, productive, and much more pleasant. I still need to find a therapist though, been meaning to get on that for the last year or so…

For those in the US looking into this, check out psychologists, they are fully equipped and qualified to evaluate and diagnose various types of neurodivergence in people and are easier to get appointments with than most psychiatrists (if you are diagnosed and want to try medication as a treatment option you’ll still need to find a psychiatrist, but that can be easier with a diagnosis in hand). They are generally cheaper since they aren’t medical doctors, and many insurance plans still cover their services. Don’t skip or miss appointments, especially on purpose. It isn’t going to help in a diagnosis and is likely to just make it harder to get help you need and are trying to get. Lock in on that hyper focus and be that person that’s there 20 minutes early (because with an appointment in the afternoon can you really do anything else that day anyways?). Call around, or email, most offices want to help and seem willing to point you to other providers if they can’t help you. Be prepared for a wait though, it’s common to get an appointment 3-6 months out in many areas (more reason not to miss appointments on purpose!).