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Fuck it, there is no substitute.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=pzagBTcYsYQ
(if i could i would upload the original flash animation from albino black sheep)
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Wisconsinite here where the badger is native and the mascot for the University of Wisconsin is the Badger.
This meme is inaccurate.
The American Badger will also remove your kidneys and sell them on the black market as well, to support their meth habit.
The badger moniker comes from lead miners that initially settled the Wisconsin territory. They often didn’t even bother building homes at first and just lived in their wildcat lead mines, like a badger.
TIL!
I’ve lived in Wisconsin since 2006 and did not know that.
Thank you!
I’m in new mexico and saw a badger crossing the road while I was driving to work. It stopped in the middle of the road, turned towards me and waited, like it was deciding whether or not to fuck up the large metal thing coming towards it. Then slowly turned and continued on it’s way when it decided I wasn’t worth it. No fear whatsoever.
Brother in law had a huge wolf dog. The kind that can put it’s paws on your shoulders and look at you face to face. Massive. He got in a tussel with a badger and got tore up, took two weeks to heal. Then took off and came back with a 40 lbs badger in his mouth. Overall a 40 lbs meth badger = 150 lbs wolf dog.
Dog had a bone to pick with that badger
That was a good boy
Badger Boogaloo 2 - Payback is a Bitch.
Was it the same badger?
Australian badgers are half this size, have no teeth at all, but can project venom 50ft from a gland in their nostril. The venom is completely harmless to humans, however it soaks into the skin and causes a pheromone to be emitted from the lungs such that when you are asleep, it attracts 14 different species of deadly venomous spiders that are attracted to your airway from up to a 4km radius.
I don’t want to know if this is true or not. Nobody look it up.
No.
Those are the ones related to drop bears, right? I mean they’ve gotta be.
You had me in the first half
Of course Australian badgers would do this.
That’s worse. So much worse. “I won’t kill you but you’ll wish I did”
Wat.
It sounds kinda based on stink badgers but they also aren’t in Australia.
Reality is that they’ll both kill you. European badgers are just more classy about it.
“oh dear oh dear i’m so sorry about this, i really am.”
European badger will poison your tea. American badger will mount your freshly-severed head above his oversize fireplace.
That sounds more like a Canadian badger
He’s just a lil guy diesThat’s exactly what badgers do in the stories of Beatrix Potter
Cook meth?
Having just visited the Lakes District, it’s wild how much Beatrix Potter stores there are.
I guess that’s why my American ass grew up with Beatrix Potter. My English grandparents had a caravan in the lake district
Yep! Potter owned a fuck ton of land in that area and donated it to the national trust, which is a big reason why the entire area is the British equivalent of a national park.
Wait till you hear what they do in Brian Jacques’ Redwall series!
Honey badgers will fuck up your shit simply because it was there.
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I’ve witnessed a European badger stand up to a golden retriever much bigger than it barking and growling aggressively in its face and the badger stood its ground. I don’t know if it was too scared to turn away or if it genuinely wanted to fight, but it was brave AF either way. (also I’ve never seen such a clean badger, but tbf most examples I see are dead on the road :/ )
American badger is a wolverine? Genuine question.
No, this is a wolverine:
It’s about twice as big as an American badger.
No, this is a wolverine
No, this is a wolverine:
He’s a living raging powerhouse who’s bound to knock you back on your emerald posterior!
Fucking awesome
Ah, a family sized meth weasel.
😲
If you think American badgers are bad wait till you meet the crack fox
Dammit is this how we got the Lion & Wardrobe and such?
When I was a child, I was told that hunters used to put things like twigs in their boots, so the European badger would let go, when they heard the “leg break”.
Though I doubted it even then.
