Besides all the reasons other commenters have said, it’s because mental health is a pseudo-social phenomenon among teens.

Having a mental illness gets them attention, online and in person. I have two teens, and even though both have diagnosed mental illness due to trauma from their other parent, they still seek, discuss, and revel in self-diagnoses.

If a friend claims to have something, they rush to the internet to do “research,” and begin exhibiting “symptoms.” Same thing is true with other labels.

We have a dearth of parenting, due to needing two incomes to make a household run. Adult attention is scarce, so teens make up for it with wild claims and garnering attention from other teens. The internet makes it easy to model behaviors. So yes, there is an increase in mental illness, but not the kinds, nor for the reasons the internet would have us believe.

The only times God has spoken directly to me were to tell me I was being stupid.

Well, yes. AI models don’t extract meaning. They parrot statistically likely responses based on words used. They had to research that?

I see you’re an optimist.

deleted by creator

deleted by creator

It HAS enabled it. I’ve watched my kids be abused for 15 years, powerless to stop it, because CPS told me to stop “causing trouble” with my ex after my second report, or I’d lose custody.

And nothing heinous has ever been done without religion?

The faithful give over three times as much in charitable donations as the secular, and volunteer three to four times as often.

Plus, the religious have been persecuted for their beliefs as long as there had been human history, which is what you are proposing by suggesting that religion should be eliminated.

That’s not religion. That’s abusers using religion to control people. Which unfortunately the most vocal make sound like that’s all religion.

I am fairly faithful, though more liberal than many in my faith. My kids have come out to me maybe a dozen times in total, and have been disappointed every time because I didn’t go crazy on them. Most religious people don’t hate LGBTQ, even if they also don’t agree with some of it. Most religious parents love their children AND their faith, and are willing to let their kids make their own choices.

Don’t let a vocal few and their media response cause you to try to squish your parents into a box. They can love you and not love your choices, but also support you making them. Not everything is black and white. If you have kids, some day your kids will subscribe to ideologies you don’t like, too. It’s part of parenting. Parents are allowed to be disappointed when their kids reject the things they love.

Just stay true to what you feel is right, try to love your imperfect parents, give it a few years and everything will look much different one way or the other.

Just this week, I sat across from a male psychologist while he asked me if I’d reported abuse my daughter went through at the hands of her dad.

No, I didn’t.

First, she didn’t say anything until years later, when she no longer had to see him.

Second, the second time I did report something, I was told to stop causing trouble between me and my ex spouse, or I’d lose custody of the kids. I was terrified of being able to protect them even less.

Third, each time I reported cost me thousands of dollars I didn’t have because he retaliated through the courts.

So no, I haven’t reported anything since then. And yes, I’m ashamed. But shame or not, I don’t know what I could have done differently.

The courts truss women like pigs and roast them on a spit for even hinting at trying to protect their kids, then skewer them again when they don’t.

deleted by creator

Yes, the “I think” is exactly the type of thing I meant about self- deprecating behaviors. I am not good at naturally soft language, but it’s exhausting to be constantly trying to monitor that.

Thank you so much for being a sounding board.

now there is no uncomfortable peace with these people

So true! I have a lot of anxiety about keeping my job. I was laid off twice in one year (first for not folding on my desired career path, second for a company acquisition) shortly after having my second baby and going through a divorce from an abuser, so I don’t deal well with work conflict any more. I’m the only earner in the house, and I’m not sure I’m mentally well enough to handle another “layoff.” So I’m in the folding mode, but it’s hurting my already fragile mental health.

The self-deprecating tools are things like helping someone else come up with my idea so it doesn’t come from me, making it clear that I’m just advising, asking leading questions, small talk, etc. I know they aren’t great, but it’s hard to let go of things that have protected you. I’m way too blunt for my own good, naturally. I’m looking into the possibility that I am autistic, after that possibility was raised.

I would suggest looking around for female leaders at your company

Thank you. My friend and boss’s boss was the only female leader in my part of the company, and she recently passed away from cancer. It’s been hard missing my mentor on top of dealing with this.

I really appreciate the rest of your advice. I don’t think my softening behaviors sabotage me, in fact it’s when I forget them to focus on the problem that I get in trouble. But maybe I should think more about that.

Because working with direct supervision is a far cry from making decisions that affect everyone.

I have a 16yo, bless her heart. No way is she ready to vote. I’d far rather not tax children than give them access to running anything connected to law.

Part of the reason 18yos are “ready” to vote is they ostensibly have a couple years of working under their belt. 16yo have no idea how disconnected from reality they really are. Give them a couple more years to operate under responsibilities, first.