Yeah, unless you’re particularly well equipped for that type of interaction, you’re unlikely to get any kind of satisfying outcome by asking them a question

Those sorts of people have a lot of experience gish galloping, rationalizing their own contradictions, and feeling smug about whatever bullshit response they give.

I don’t think their facade is impossible to engage with or break through, but it will always take more than one clever question to get there.

That’s great, and it’s nice that you don’t have to deal with that jolt of dysphoria in those situations.

I’m simply saying that it’s also common (and okay) to not be entirely comfortable with those terms. Especially from strangers or acquaintances.

I don’t think seeking to reduce the linguistic pattern of male as the default is a misguided effort.

“Offended” is a bit of a strong word.

Many trans folks are, understandably, bummed out when gendered terms that refer to their AGAB are used to refer to them.

I don’t think there’s anything wrong with trying to avoid causing that brief moment of dysphoria. That just feels like a thoughtful and kind thing to do.

I love using magic items in place of house rules. It makes it easier for everyone when “house rules” are explicitly spelled out in an item description, and helps prevent players from being confused or surprised about which rules do and do not get enforced and in which way.

To contribute my own D&D 5e specific example: I like to have enchanted weapons that each have access to one or two battlemaster maneuvers per short rest. e.g. Quarterstaff of Tripping (trip attack) or Commander’s Longsword (Commander’s Strike). To keep it simple, I use the weapon’s damage die as the superiority die.