Yea I always provide lifetime support to linux convertees and so far every issue we had in lmde could be solved with the right keyword search. I was hoping the right server distro would have similarity good documentation. The Linux version of TrueNas and open media vault look like promising such distributions.
The idea evolves with all the comments and I think the way is to make two identical servers from thin clients. Identical hardware, different passwords. Two mirrored drives over usb each and the internal nvme for write cache and OS. Perhaps the OS could be immutable on a USB, to further reduce the risk of sudden self immolation. Just need to learn flashing the latest version.
As long as there is a competent webgui I know they are willing and capable of reading documentation and forum answers. Should something ever happen to our relationship my partner can easily take their data even if their server died, but they do say debin goes forever with regular updates. In the meantime, the server gets the same treatment as mine.
I put openwrt on their router and an adblock dns already but a dns sink would be cool too
Neither of us want to learn proxmox, but I am still convinced there are simple and feature rich solutions that don’t require that.