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When I lived in Italy it always caught me off guard how every business closed up shop after 18:00, the city looked dead past these hours. I’m used to shops and markets being open 24/7, and it was a vast contrast. But I liked it in the long run, people should have their off hours.

Some cultures eat with their mouths open and it is considered as a kind of a compliment to the cook, like “hey it’s so good, it makes me do this loud noise while I eat it”. Quite unpleasant.

Believe it or not it was a trip to Memphis for training from Canada. I am not well travelled by any means. I made it into Memphis and after a short ride, arrived at my hotel. The people who worked there were some of the most lovely people I have ever met. Southern hospitality was in their soul. I even got to sit down one afternoon with some other guests and hotel staff to discuss differences in politics, healthcare and so on. It blew my mind when people were telling me the expense of just having a baby delivered at their local hospital. I could not wrap my mind around not wanting socialized healthcare. It was the first evening in the hotel, I decided to turn on the local news for Memphis. This was the first real culture shock. The violence. Shootings, stabbings, robberies. I honestly went from feeling like this place is amazing, to this place scares the sh!t out of me. I could not understand why in a place where I had met such beautiful and lovely individuals had to live in a place that was so violent. So after my training week had finished up I decided to head to Beal street and walk around the downtown core a bit. Beal was very much what I had imagined. Kind of felt like a tourist trap. Anyhow I ventured off the beaten path and headed into the town to do some shopping around. I had left a local record shop and heard the ranting of some biker coming out of a building. He was yelling the most racist things if I have ever heard. I was floored. Most of the racists I have encountered where I live are old asshats who keep it secret. But this man out in the street let his hatred fly.

Memphis was this weird crossover world where I was treated like gold and at the same time had to feel afraid for my safety. It still blows my mind the racism and bigotry people still face. It has stuck with me for years.

None because I don’t live in America

Reverse racism in China and to a less extent Japan. Only really exists for white people. Better pay and more attention just for being white but it get old really quick. I’ve actually found that it’s city people who are more annoying about it. When I got to the countryside I find them more kind. With all the things wrong with America, I am thankful for it not being an ethnostate.

I went to India (New Delhi, Goa, Chennai, Jaipur) as a middle class Canadian.

People hanging off the side of busses, monkeys running around everywhere, open sewage, cows eating garbage on the side of the road, literally everyone staring at me, tons of people following me trying to give me directions to tourist sites, different views on personal space.

Shit was wild.

I graduated from high school in 1995. The community I grew up in was incredibly diverse. It was a decent sized city (100k+) and we had about 3,000 students the year I graduated.

That summer, we went to rural Idaho for a family reunion. It was probably the first time in my life that I visited a place that was exclusively white. I’m a white dude myself, but like I said, grew up in a diverse community.

The lack of diversity was a giant culture shock to me. I was in a small community with a population that was about half the size of the school I had just graduated from.

This is going to seem minor, but it was a shock to me.

I grew up in Texas. I lived in very metropolitan places – near downtown Dallas, and near the Houston medical center. So I never thought that I was culturally isolated or anything.

When I finally left the state for a job, I went to Los Angeles, circa 2007. In my first week there, a lady pulled up next to me on the street and asked me where the courthouse was. I had a vague idea, but explained that I was new to the area so my advice should be taken with a grain of salt. People familiar with the LAX area will know that the nearby courthouse is a tall building with something resembling a crown or halo, I pointed her toward that.

It wasn’t until a couple of minutes later I realized what seemed strange about the encounter. The lady was of African-American descent.

I thought back on 3 decades of living in Texas, and I cannot once remember being approached by a black stranger and asked a question. Not one single time. Houston has a large homeless population, I had many encounters with panhandlers. I couldn’t remember one single black person.

In fact, as I thought about it, a HUGE difference between Texas and California was that black folks on the street behaved very differently. In California, they looked you in the eye, they said “hello”, etc. In Texas – at least, up until I left in 2007 – black folks were strictly “heads down, eyes on your own business”. Even thinking back on some black friends and co-workers, I realized that they behaved very differently in public than my white friends did.

The whole thing made me sad for my black friends back in Texas. And now that we know how police treat black folks, I guess I can see why they behaved the way they did.

Not me, but the first time my boyfriend traveled with my family somewhere, he could not believe that sitting quietly in a living room reading was a thing. My family didn’t feel the need to fill our day to the brim with tours or shopping or other activities. And that was shocking to him.

Going to sound weird but going to one of my childhood friend’s house

He had a loving family where everyone was happy and helped each other. They communicated with each other happily about things that interested them. They were unafraid to share what was on their minds and what they were passionate about. They asked each other to do things without threatening or screaming. When they did have disagreements they talked them out. They’d say, “I love you,” without a hint of pain or irony.

It was jarring. It threw me off. I went over to his place a lot (like literally almost every day for the time were friends) and it wasn’t until I had been going to his place for a few weeks did it dawn on me that I had never seen his parents argue.

And honestly one of the most eye opening experiences from when I was young about how a family is supposed to function.

I guess you could say it was culture shock because my relatives operated on a culture of fear, hatred, and a lack of love. The phrase, “You have to love me, I’m family,” was uttered entirely too many times. Violence and the threat of violence was the only motivator my relatives used.

I was friends with that guy for 3 years. I’ll never forget his parents telling me that they saw me as family. I’d say those years did more good for shaping who I am today than all the years I spent with my relatives. I look back fondly on the time I spent with them. I wish it didn’t end the way it did though.

I hope they’re all doing well.

Becoming a civilian again after being in the military was interesting. Simple things felt weird all the time; I kept feeling like I had to show my ID to buy groceries, stuff like that. But probably moving to the East Coast (NoVA) from Colorado in 2002 was the biggest. I was in absolute shock at the price of housing, hours of commuting every day, and most of all, how horrible the people were. Mean, rude people, angry all the time and intentionally threatening on the roads. Being there made me cry a lot in the first year.

The first time I ever left the country was to go live in Indonesia for a bit. They were soo many things, and it started the instant I got there. At the airport, I remember seeing a huge sign that said “Welcome to Indonesia! Death penalty for drug traffickers!”. Also, the traffic was so wild in the taxi ride from the airport to my apartment. All the cars, horse carriages, 10 times as many mopeds/motorcycles as cars, bajais (tuk tuks), all weaving so chaotically I had to close my eyes.

Having a maid/cook, people who did our laundry, and finding out how common that was.

Having to bribe a cop for being out late at night with a guy (I’m a woman), but only having to give him the equivalent of like $5USD.

Everyone staring at me ALWAYS. Random people asking to take photos with me all the time 😆.

Haggling at basically every store/market except the fancier/chain ones.

Squat toilets. Also seeing shoe prints on standard toilets and signs telling people not to squat on those toilets.

Armed guards and metal detectors at most malls and hotels. Every time we’d come home our car would have to go through an armed security checkpoint and they’d check inside the car and open the trunk etc.

They only use darn cash in Germany. Feels like going back to ancient times.

Paper money. Just… What? Why can you just rip up money?